Should a Wife Submit to Her Husband?

June 29, 2023

Should a wife submit to her husband? The short answer is yes but under one condition. The Bible states the condition in which a wife should submit to her husband. 

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. (Ephesians 5:22-23 ESV)

Before feminists start throwing stones let’s delve in a little deeper.

But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. (1 Corinthians 11:3 ESV)

1 Corinthians 11:3 shows that a man should first be submitted to Christ if he is to expect his wife to be submitted to him. 

A woman is under no obligation to submit to a man who isn’t submitted to Christ. There is nothing more dangerous than a woman allowing a man who isn’t living a life that reflects Christ in him to lead. 

God’s decree is for a man to be the head of the household. This is perfect if the head of the household is a man of God. 

The husband being the head of the household has nothing to do with who the physical breadwinner is but has more to do with the spiritual. In the spirit, the man is the head of the house. God covers a man, and a man covers a woman. Why then should a woman submit to a man who isn’t covered by God?

It is enough for the disciple that he be as his master, and the servant as his lord. If they have called the master of the house Beelzebub (Satan), how much more shall they call them of his household? (Mathew 10:25 KJV)

A man that isn’t submitted to God is subjecting his household to whatever or whomever he is submitted to. 

It amazes me when I see women get into relationships with spiritually bound men and wonder why they struggle in such relationships. It’s not rocket science, whatever a man is subjecting himself to is what he will subject his household to. The doors a man opens in the spirit are open to his household and the doors he shuts in the spirit are shut to his household.

This is why it is imperative that a woman chooses the right man. A man that has no power in the spirit is a dead man walking. A man that isn’t praying on a daily basis, who doesn’t have the power to command demons out of his household might as well surrender his household to Satan.

Mathew 10:1 gives us an idea of what a man that has submitted himself to Christ looks like.

And he (Jesus) called to him his twelve disciples and gave them authority over unclean spirits, to cast them out, and to heal every disease and every affliction. (Mathew 10:1 ESV)

The Bible shows that when true believers command evil spirits in Jesus’ name, the spirits have no choice but to obey.

The seventy-two returned with joy, saying, “Lord, even the demons are subject to us in your name!” (Luke 10:17 ESV)

A husband should have the authority through Christ Jesus to cast out demons. I’ll give an example. A child walks into the home and his father notices he has picked up the spirit of anger from school. His father should have the spiritual awareness to identify the spirit and the authority in Christ to command it out of his child. 

This doesn’t mean a woman can’t cast demons out of her children. It however means that if a saved and sanctified woman of God binds herself in the spirit (via sexual intercourse or marriage) with an unsaved man, she is subject to whatever he is subject to.

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6:14 ESV)

A woman has no business marrying a man who isn’t a true believer and follower of Christ. 

Humans are spirits in a body, not bodies in a spirit. This means we are more spirit than we are body. A man that is strong in body but weak in spirit is a weak man.

The rank we hold in the physical isn’t as valuable as the rank we hold in the spiritual. This is because the majority of the attacks humans face are spiritual.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. (Ephesians 6:12 KJV)

How can a man protect his household from spiritual attacks if he isn’t strong in spirit? How can he rebuke the Kingdom of Darkness if he has no authority over them? 

He (Jesus) also told them a parable: “Can a blind man lead a blind man? Will they not both fall into a pit? (Luke 6:39). 

You wouldn’t let a blind man lead you around, would you? A woman should not allow herself to be led by a man unfit by Kingdom standards.

It is impossible for a man who isn’t subscribed and submitted to God through Christ Jesus to have the power and authority to fully protect his household.

Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. (Psalms 127:1 ESV)

In this day and age, the question women should be asking isn’t whether or not they should submit to a man in marriage, the question should be: “Who should we be marrying?”.

A woman shouldn’t marry a man who isn’t living a Godly life. If he isn’t living a Godly life, he isn’t submitted to Christ; if he isn’t submitted to Christ, he isn’t worthy to be a husband. 

Statistics show that nearly half of all marriages end in divorce. I believe one of the main reasons for this is because women aren’t picking their partners carefully. I say women because studies show that nearly 70% of divorces are initiated by women.

Before a woman picks a life partner she need only ask one question: “Who is the man submitted to in the Spirit?”

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  • Avatar
    Reply Victorkelly June 29, 2023 at 6:03 pm

    God is NEVER the author of confusion. The ideal, as God sets it, is supposed to be that the man submits to God and the woman submits to the man. If a man does not submits to God, that is not a licence for a woman not to submit to her husband. The scriptures cannot be broken. The Apostle Peter admonished women, Christian women especially to submits to their husbands even those men were not saved. 1 Peter 3:1-6. Any woman who hides under the fact that her husband is not saved to disobey or be incorrigible is in error and is not guiltless.

    • Avatar
      Reply Jay June 29, 2023 at 6:43 pm

      Spot on!!! That’s no excuse at all. Well said ??????

    • Avatar
      Reply Mary Ojile June 29, 2023 at 10:55 pm

      I agree that a wife should submit to her husband. My point is this, a woman shouldn’t marry a man she isn’t ready to submit to. If he isn’t submitted to God, she shouldn’t marry him in the first place. As you said, the ideal is for the man to be submitted to God and the woman to the man.

      Women have a lot more to lose by getting into the wrong marriage than men. I prefer for women to be equipped with the knowledge that although God’s design is for the wife to be submitted to her husband, not every man qualifies as a husband according to God’s standards.

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    Reply Idoko Luke June 29, 2023 at 6:20 pm

    This is very powerful. Remain blessed.

  • Avatar
    Reply Theresa June 29, 2023 at 6:32 pm

    Another beautiful and inspiring piece. More Grace for you in Jesus Name.

  • Avatar
    Reply Jay June 29, 2023 at 6:41 pm

    No truer words than this…I couldn’t agree more. However, I’ll leave this thought here, in a situation where a woman refuses to be led because she feels “she’s got it all”, she sees as herself as the head because she’s privileged to have an upper hand in the scheme of things around her or rather she’s well placed status wise, what do you call that? Mind you the husband tries by all means necessary to enlighten her further about the standards in the bible of her role in a marriage, which is allowing her husband to take charge and she assists? In this present day and age, if you’ll agree with me, the feminist ideology/mentality has clouded most women’s idea of a Union/marriage, hiding under auspices of equality. That’s a topic for another day. Having highlighted all these, it is pertinent for a husband to be fully grounded in the ways of the lord, Christlike lifestyle as that would help to be in tune with the spirit. However as Men or husbands we cannot come correct a 100% at all times, there are times that we would drop the ball no matter how spiritually minded or involved we are, not intentionally but because life happens sometimes. Does that mean we are not good leaders or husbands? I’ll leave it be for now.

  • Avatar
    Reply Ojile R. E June 30, 2023 at 11:14 am

    That’s a very nice piece. More blessings..

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